The weakest mom

It was Haley's 15 month well check yesterday. Her weight is only 21lb and 2oz, and 25%, maybe she's now more active and teething, so she didn't gain much weight in the last 3 months. However, she's a tall girl, 32.3inches and 94%. As mandatory, she needed to get blood draw for lead exam at the lab. I had to hold her tight at the chair while the nurse tried to find her vein. There was another nurse trying to hold her arm as well. Haley was crying...crying so loud, she turned her head and looked at me , crying loudly and saying "MOM, HELP ME HELP ME!" Oh, my heart hurt so bad, my tears began to fall too. The nurse put a needle on her arm, yet still can't get the blood draw. She took the needle out and tried to poke her at a different place, but Haley was struggling, kicking, and yelling. I finally broke down, I cried too, so the nurse stopped and asked if I wanted to continue or not. I couldn't, I couldn't stand that. Owen has a day off tomorrow so I will have daddy bring Haley there. Haley stopped crying, but kept pointing at the doorway after they released her from the lab chair. It was so embarrassed that everyone at the lab was looking at me. I guess I am the weakest mom ever!!! I want to set a good example to Haley to be a brave girl, I tried so hard to hold my emotions, but I couldn't. I wish Haley will not be as overly sensitive as her mom. I had to go to the restroom to cry out even more and calm down before I walked out of the hospital. It was just so embarrassing.

Owen brought Haley to the lab this morning, while I went to visit grandma. Owen said she cried and asked to leave as soon as she saw the lab chair. But within minutes, with the help of the nurse, it was done like a piece of cake.

I always thought Haley is a separate individual now, how come I suffer so much when I see her suffer. I now totally understand the meaning of 切肉不離皮.